Giving it 100% (times 3)

Q: I'd love to be a creative director some day. But I'd also like to be a mother and everything I hear about the need for 100% job focus at the top makes me fearful I would truthfully have to make a choice. Can a mom in the group please tell me how you do it?

Let me start by saying, if you want kids, have them.
This is a life decision that I personally wouldn’t let my career get in the way of.

Managing a creative director’s life and a home life is really hard. But it’s hard for anyone who wants to be exceptional at her job and still have a family.

It’s true, to be a half decent creative director, you have to be 100% dedicated.
But also to be a good mother, you have to be 100% dedicated.
And to be a good spouse, you have to be 100% dedicated. (People often forget about this one, but it’s really, really important to your happiness.)

So how do I give 300% and balance the three?

I’ll tell you how I manage and manage to have a pretty happy life. And for me that’s the ultimate goal.

First, I realized there is no such thing as balance. One is always out weighing the other. I’m constantly deciding which way I’m going to tilt the balance.

Secondly, whatever I’m doing, I give it my full attention. So when I’m at work, I work.  And I work my ass my off and I’m totally focused.

When I’m at home, I’m at home. I’ll keep my cell on or check my e-mail if I have some unfinished work or a deadline looming, but otherwise I try to keep away from work. I’m unapologetic about the importance of having a life outside of work. I think it makes me better at what I do.

Most importantly, I have great support. I work for an enlightened company. I work with really talented people I trust.  And I have a great spouse: someone who understands when I have to work late or travel and is willing to help out.

Being a great CD, a great mother and a great spouse are not mutually exclusive.
You can do whatever you want.  You just have to work at it. Good luck.

-Judy John

Comments

[Evelyn Monroe Neill]

Ahhhh the mother thing - it's HUGE! When I had my first child I was a creative director at Wieden & Kennedy working on a lot of international stuff and cool stuff. We travelled all the time and we were loving it - all of us. I never saw the problem coming (no comments on my preparedness and foresight, please!)So I was absolutely blindsided by the change this little 8 pound thing had wrought.

I wasn't willing to hang out anymore. I wasn't wiling to just be there. If there was work to be done, count me in. If not, I was out of there. But I felt so guilty.

One day I was talking to Dan Wieden and he asked me how I was. I told him I was leaving at 5:00 when I could and I felt really guilty about it. He cracked up.

He just asked me if I was doing good work. I said I was. And he said, "I don't give a fuck." (We all said "fuck" a lot back then.)

You know when you're doing good work. You know when you're valuable to a company. Make yourself valuable to a company. Do good work. Enjoy the work. Keep your eyes on the prize as my friend Eve says. And it will work out. I have two kids and was an ECD in my last position. Anyone who knows me knows I go home when I can. As for the balance - when the juggling isn't worth it any more, when the joy's gone or very musty - quit. That's my credo. It has worked for me.